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As We See It

The Help Desk

Where we sort it all out for you

NFL modifies policy, will allow Las Vegas ads on Super Bowl telecasts. It’s going to be real hard to achieve the freshness of those Budweiser Clydesdales, but we’ll do our darnedest.

Mayor Oscar Goodman changes party affiliation to nonpartisan. It’s not that he’s mulling a run for governor; he just suddenly realized that cutting off people’s thumbs doesn’t fall under the traditional two-party system.

Police arrest 69-year-old man for allegedly throwing paint at “Welcome to Fabulous Las Vegas” sign. Police are worried that if this guy doesn’t clean up his act, it could really affect his future.

Las Vegas teacher suspended for telling students the Holocaust never happened.When questioned about the suspension, she responded, “what suspension?

Steve Wynn pays $33.2 million for Rembrandt self-portrait. It’s a truly one-of-a-kind work of ... and Steve’s already put his elbow through it.

Las Vegas Metro revises department’s driving policy. It’s pretty stringent—it requires officers to keep it under 200 within city limits.

Monorail considering bankruptcy protection. Wow, we’re absolutely shocked—that thing’s still operating?

Environmental advocacy group rates Las Vegas’ water among the nation’s worst.Joke’s on them—in about 10 years we won’t have any water. So there!

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