June 3, 2010 · 11:28 AM

The worst $2 I ever spent

By Rick Lax

Hold on to your hats! It's about to get (a little) windy.

Town Square put a “Hurricane Simulation” machine between Whole Foods and California Pizza Kitchen. One day the sidewalk was empty, the next day there was a hideous telephone-less telephone booth blocking my path.

So I loaded $2 into the machine and I stepped inside.

A prerecorded voice said, “Here we go!” or “Let’s get this thing started!” or something cheesy like that.

And then the wind began.

The best way I can describe Town Square’s $2 Hurricane Simulation booth is this: It’s like a really tall guy blowing on your head.

I knew the booth’s wind wouldn’t actually be as strong as that of a hurricane, but it wasn’t even in the ballpark. It wasn’t even in a city that had a MLB team.

At best, this machine is a waste of money. At worst, this machine confuses young children. They get inside, feel the gentle breeze and go through life thinking hurricanes aren’t so bad after all. Give money to Katrina victims? No way! I’ve got a pretty good idea of what hurricanes are like, and they’re not that bad.

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