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March Sign Roundup

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3223—Got that, bad guys?

I came home to find that sign taped to my gate. Nobody took it down for a couple of days. Presumably, because we all realized that unmanned gates provide absolutely no security protection in the first place. The sign just served as an unfriendly, depressing reminder.

A special, special sign.

And here’s another sign I came across last week—this one at the gym. In case you can’t make out the marker, the sign reads: “today’s specials Bonzai $5 Special Eat Healthy complete it with a Coke.”

It’s definitely a food deal, and it’s definitely a special one. But I don’t know how the Coke is healthy…nor do I know part of the cow the “Bonzai” comes from.

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Rick Lax

Rick wrote the books Fool Me Once: Hustlers, Hookers, Headliners, and How Not to Get Screwed in Vegas and Lawyer ...

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