06.27.12 · 10:57 AM

The vanishing Coke trick

That’s a 1.25 liter bottle of Sprite. I used to have a 1.25 liter of Coke, too. Here’s where it went: Days ago, I hosted a party for about 10 friends. One guy I didn’t know came, too. He’d driven one of my invited friends. So, this random guy: I ran down the beverage list for him and he picked Coke. So I removed the bottle from the fridge and set it down. He twisted off the cap and started ... Read more...

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06.25.12 · 10:02 AM

Backpedaling at the Rio

I’m not okay with the way this Rio roulette wheel story played out. The backstory: Last week, poker player Jeff Romano tweeted a photo of a Rio roulette table’s electronic scoreboard. The wheel had apparently hit the number 19 seven times in a row. Romano accompanied the tweet with the words “yea roulette wheel at the Rio isn’t rigged…” The Internet went nuts. Everybody wanted to get in on the discussion of how unlikely this event was, a seemingly once-in-a-lifetime ... Read more...

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06.20.12 · 10:10 AM

Backing down and regretting it

It’s my girlfriend’s younger brother’s 17th birthday. I’m taking them to see Weezer at the Mandalay pool. We park in the garage and walk towards the escalators. The down one is in repair. It’s not too crowded in the garage and the escalators aren’t very long, so I propose to the group running down the up escalator. This is where the escalator repairman chimes in: “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” He didn’t say we weren’t allowed; he ... Read more...

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06.18.12 · 2:31 PM

The least dangerous game

The following incidents occurred while playing a 30-minute “Ironman” round of laser tag at Laser Quest on Lake Mead: -A boy, 12 or 13, shot me and screamed, “Die, you Nazi motherf#*ker. Seemed unfair that he’d get to be the allied power in this scenario seeing as though I’m Jewish and he had super-light blonde hair. -A boy, about 14 or 15, grabbed the front of my gun and shot me in the shoulder. I told him, “If you do ... Read more...

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06.4.12 · 2:54 PM

Camels, rain, the Book of Mormon

That’s a camel in the street, alright. Real camel, real street, America. Here’s what happened: At the last second, a ticket to Book of Mormon opened up, so I flew to New York for the weekend. (Really long flight, turns out. Who knew?) After the show, on Sunday, I wanted to take a quick stroll around Central Park before heading back to the bus station to make my flight back to Vegas. On the way to the park, I walked ... Read more...

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05.30.12 · 2:22 PM

Pretty girls vs. food porn

My girlfriend got a summer job at Venetian, so I’ve spent a lot of time at the casino these past two months. I park on the garage’s 7th floor, take the elevator down to 3, and walk through the hallway that leads from the valet to the Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. A couple weeks back, I saw something funny happen in that hallway: A couple, holding hands tightly, was walking towards me. Suddenly, the guy, about 150 lbs heavier ... Read more...

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05.23.12 · 2:14 PM

Unimpressed, lions

I just visited the San Diego Zoo, and let me tell you, a lot of animals suck. Even the supposedly good ones, like the lions. They just lie there and look at you. And the pandas? Terrible. First of all, there was only one panda on display, and he—I don’t actually know/care about the animal’s correct sex—was facing away from us, sitting behind a log, eating a piece of bamboo. For like 20 minutes. Bravo, panda. That said, a couple ... Read more...

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05.4.12 · 9:41 AM

Board game hypocrisy

When it comes to board games, all y’all are a bunch of posers. Let me explain: Everybody goes on and on about how much they love Stratego, Catch Phrase, and Apples to Apples. Most of my friends claim a particular affinity for board games. And they’re always telling me that they’re going to hold Board Game Nights and invite me. Never happens. Everybody talks the talk, but nobody plays the play. And when people do play the play, they don’t ... Read more...

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04.27.12 · 10:58 AM

David Sedaris funnies up the Smith Center

The top three quotes from David Sedaris’s April 26th book reading at the Smith Center: 3 Recounting a fight in which one man hacked off another man’s forearm: “One man was armed with a cleaver. The other was disarmed.” 2 Discussing a nonfiction book by Gordon Grise called The Book of Deadly Animals: “It makes you feel great about eating meat.” 1 During the Q&A portion of the evening, a woman raised her hand and said she’d gotten married earlier ... Read more...

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04.23.12 · 9:19 AM

Drink it in

It’s time for Cleverboy to head out to LA once again. Not this week, but sometime soon. The main thing I remember from my last drive: LA gas stations are way more serious about drinking fountain selection than Vegas gas stations. Check out this nineteen-option soda dispenser I found at a California am/pm. Too much good stuff indeed.* Another great thing I found at a Cali rest stop/gas station: Sonic Boom energy drink. This company, Boston America Corp., has my ... Read more...

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Featured Cocktail

Cocktail of the Week Jun 19, 2013
by Ken Miller

Postrio’s nod to Don Quixote makes for a perfect summertime drink

When you think of summer, odds are thoughts of legendary literary character Don Quixote don’t spring to mind. But after trying a Distorted Chivalry at the Venetian’s Postrio, that might ...
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