Las Vegas Weekly

June 15, 2010 · 4:59 PM

Lock ‘em up! A proposal for pool parties

By Deanna Rilling

Now... which locker *hiccup* did I put my stuff in? Need more mojito money...

Purse duty: You know it. You hate it. But somebody’s gotta do it. Even if you’re a dude who doesn’t carry a man bag, if there are familiar females nearby, you’re gonna get stuck watching their stuff at some point.

Some newer nightclubs in Vegas have implemented convenient drawers or flip-top storage compartments built into banquette seating to stash a bag or sport coat in case sticky fingers wander by. However, those features are generally reserved for the bottle service crowd at VIP tables, and having your phone and wallet in a pocket or purse in the club isn’t that big of a deal.

It’s when pool party season arrives that problems arise.

As Mike Tyson once told me when I had my purse stolen at the former Seamless afterhours, “You can’t trust nobody. You gotta watch your stuff. You can’t trust nobody… Does anyone have a cigarette?”

The same kinda goes for pool parties.

Sure, you could bring only your ID and credit card. If those get wet in the pool, it’s not too big of a deal. (Just disinfect them later.)

Yet for nearly any partier, there’s no cell phone left behind. Phones are like an extension of one’s being, a lifeline to the Twitterverse telling everyone who doesn’t care what an awesome time you’re having poolside and the crazy shit you just saw (Twitpic!).

And that’s not all you’re packing. You gotta bring the point-and-shoot camera. After all, you’ve been working on those abs for months just to have a new Facebook profile picture. But when you want to get in a water-gun fight or doggy paddle around the pool, what to do with your not-so-water-resistant possessions?

Whether it’s a quick trip to the little girls’ room or a dip in the shallow end, you can’t just leave your designer purse tucked in the corner, table reservation or not. You never know who might try to swipe it.

Which finally brings me to my point: Why the heck aren’t there lockers at party pools?

Remember back in the day when you’d go to Wet ‘n Wild, pump a locker full of spare change, stash your pager and cutoffs, then get that funny little key with the stretchy-plastic wrist scrunchy? Or how about those gym lockers for when you forget to bring your lock? More spare change and your belongings are guarded. Why not have the same at a party pool?

I’ve been to almost every party pool in Vegas and for the life of me I do not remember public lockers ever being available for rental. (I do hear the MGM Grand’s main pool has lockers, but that doesn't do much good for those inside Wet Republic). I propose party pools consider a wall-o-lockers to safely house precious belongings, whether they be smart phones, last season’s rhinestone tee or towering heels when you’ve slipped one too many times walking around the pool.

And it’s not just a customer service we’re talking about. Lockers are another potential moneymaker for clubs. I’d pay a few bucks to rent a locker, and so would anyone with a fat wallet, fancy watch or an iPhone. Plus someone’s probably already invented lockers where you can swipe a credit card for payment, just like those ballet-flat vending machines (which, clubs also should get for tired tootsies, might I add).

Just a thought... What do you think?

Share This