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Hue’s on first: The graying is ceaseless, as is the analysis

Taking a closer look in the mirror, I’ve been examining my gray hair lately. It’s whiter, really. It’s white and defiantly thick like cat whiskers. I’ve grown stray white hairs since I was about 17 years old. Over the past year, I’ve been getting my hair professionally dyed various hues of light colors that are unnatural to me and that look especially unnatural next to my racially ambiguous features. It is fun and expensive to buy a new look.

It’s really too expensive in a recession. I, however, felt like it was more costly to not be blond in an increasingly competitive market. Whether gentlemen actually prefer blondes or not, I imagine that they prefer them in strip clubs and believing something works is often all it takes for it to actually work. At least I believe that’s how these things work in the bizarre world of stripping. It probably has something to do with confidence. Either way, I was blond.

A few months ago, I went back to my natural and vulgarly common color. With a few inches of my natural color grown in, I noticed that over the past year while I’ve been dying my hair, the growth of my grays increased exponentially. Clusters where there had been only strays. The occurrence of grays spread like a crop virus seizing my youth. I don’t mind the hairs so much. I’m just surprised. It might be genetic or it might be stress.

Either way, I’m bored and I’m going to pay a visit to my colorist soon. She told me that with the recession, many of her customers are going back to their natural colors. Could this mean an increase in brunettes? Are blondes endangered species in the stripping ecosystem?

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