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Stripped

At Disneyland, we're all ears ... but not ALL ears

February 19th, 2010

I once asked a customer from Anaheim if he liked Disneyland. He didn't. He probably hates kittens, too.

  • A transsexual was being serviced in a most appropriate way, especially if you are a transsexual.

  • I didn't want to believe the news from the TV, so I just kept cleaning the kitchen.

  • A new year and a new decade have arrived, and I am grateful for the crumpled, sweaty singles in my panties.

  • I had a really nice customer on my first day back. We had a kind of an exclusivity thing going.

  • Having been felled by the flu, I lost 10 pounds and have spent a sufficient time away from stripping.

  • You drink. You get lap dances. You barf. Is it not time to call it a night?

  • The job description is a little different -- waitress instead of dancer -- and who knows how long it'll last.

  • The StripperMobile is gone, but not forgotten, and maybe it'll be back, which would be Deja Vu all over again.

  • I'm using an electronic instrument to type this blog. Guess what it is.

  • My friend who was dressed as a slutty nun is rare, and not because she was dressed as a slutty nun.

  • I've not worked since law enforcement raided my place of work. Is this a sign that stripping might have ended for me?

  • How far would you go to be extraordinary?

  • Face-melting Turkey Day meals, carols with Liberace and a drive to the North Pole (Experience)—it's time to shake your holiday season up!

  • Opulence, decadence, excessive ornamentation and extreme wealth.

  • The most common mistake they make is thinking bigger equals better.

  • The program places local youth from single-parent and low-income homes on skate teams, pairing them with adult skate mentors.

  • "That seemed to be the right thing to do. Let’s do an album dedicated to all of our drunk, dead friends."

  • Macaulay Culkin’s pizza-themed Velvet Underground cover band handed out pizza. #MetaMoment

  • Plus David Sedaris at Smith Center and secret pot stickers.

  • Black celebrates his first EP with a release party on November 21.

  • And there's still time to donate! But seriously, check out her donation reminder videos. You won't be disappointed.

  • The stars align and just when you think it’s never going to happen, it happens ... to someone else.

  • The gaming machines of the future are built by teams of video-game caliber animators and artists—and they’re hitting casino floors today.

  • Also, Hot Water Music at Fremont Country Club and Death From Above 1979 at Brooklyn Bowl. Find all the details here!

  • From Pleasantville to I Love You Phillip Morris, a look back at the strongest work from Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels.

  • TV and star chef and restaurateur Brian Malarkey (“Top Chef,” “The Taste” and “Guy’s Grocery Games”) is bringing Searsucker to Caesars Palace in the spring. “Las Vegas is the big stage,” the animated Malarkey says.

  • Whatever you do can and will be used against you in a court of public opinion.

  • It’s similar to the magic trick where the woman is sawed in half, except in this trick, she is known as the Zig-Zag Girl.