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November 21, 2008 · 1:59 PM

A few of our favorite one-liners from Josh Blue and Ralphie May at TCF

By Allison Duck

Microphone, I own you.

Photo: Bryce Boyer

From the opener Ron G.:

“We need some cereal for black folks, like Condoleezza Rice Krispies.”

From Josh Blue:

“I feel like a chicken nugget under these lights.”

“I don’t swear. I just have really well-timed Tourette’s.”

Referring to his curved hand due to his cerebral palsy: “I got a sponsorship deal with Nike – I was born with a swoosh.”

Another palsy reference, this time about holding his newborn son: “I’m not shaking the baby, I’m just holding him!”

“We wanted to name our son after someone we both admire, so we went with Borat.”

From Ralphie May:

Noting his large size deterred him from moving around the stage during shows: “This is where you can take a break if you’re working the lights, fellas.”

On race: “We tried Caucasian for a while, but nobody could spell it, so we went back to white.”

After warning the crowd that he was “racially insensitive and culturally controversial,” May told the crowd: “If you can’t take a joke, take a cab.”

Discussion:

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