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Celebrity NFL picks: An accurate forecast is, the league is totally unpredictable

Sal DeFilippo

Celebrity Picks

Lance Burton, Monte Carlo master magician (11-10)
Chargers –3 at Saints
Jets –13 vs. Chiefs
Colts +4 at Titans
****
Anthony Crivello, star of "Phantom - The Las Vegas Spectacular" (15-6)
Falcons +9 at Eagles
Lions +7 ½ at Redskins
Colts +4 at Titans
****
Carrot Top, Luxor headliner (8-12-1)
Jaguars -7 vs. Browns
49ers -4 ½ vs. Seahawks
Dolphins +1 ½ vs. Bills
****
Danny Gans, Mirage headliner (9-12)
Jets –13 vs. Chiefs
Giants +2 ½ at Steelers
Titans -4 vs. Colts
****
Oscar Goodman, mayor of Las Vegas (9-12)
Ravens –7 vs. Raiders
Titans –4 vs. Colts
Browns +7 at Jaguars
****
Kevin Janison, KVBC meteorologist (12-9)
Buccaneers +3 ½ at Cowboys
Rams +7 at Patriots
Browns-Jaguars under 41
****
Wayne Newton, "Mr. Las Vegas" (11-10)
Giants +2 ½ at Steelers
Browns +7 at Jaguars
Saints -3 vs. Chargers

The beauty of the NFL is that some things are inherently unpredictable.

Tom Brady’s injury had turned New England from an unstoppable offensive powerhouse to a fairly pedestrian team. Tony Romo’s injury has turned Dallas’ offense from juggernaut to a day on Wall Street.

The Colts, Super Bowl champions two seasons ago, are a .500 club. The Seahawks, three seasons removed from a Super Bowl and a perennial playoff team, are 1-5. Tennessee, without Vince Young, is 6-0 and the league’s only unbeaten team.

The Rams get steamrolled for four weeks, and then beat the Redskins and dominate the Cowboys. The Dolphins start running an collegiate-style offensive set where the running back take a direct snap and the quarterback lines up at wide receiver – and it works for weeks.

Yet, in spite of the variables the NFL provides from season to season and week to week, there are two things you can still depend on.

Thank goodness we have the Lions and Bengals, and their constant futility, to keep us grounded as football fans.

This season, both clubs have really turned it up a notch, combining for an 0-13 record. And the two clubs don’t face off against one another, leaving the possibility for a couple of perfect seasons.

The Bengals have an excellent shot. They go on the road to face a Houston team that has won two straight this week, and if they can pull out a loss, they have several easy defeats on the horizon – Jacksonville, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Baltimore, Indianapolis and Washington, to be specific. Then all the Bengals have to do is lose at Cleveland and they’ll be 0-15, on the brink of perfection. Their last game, however, will be a struggle to lose – the Bengals host Kansas City on Dec. 28. Mark that one on your calendars, folks.

Meanwhile, the Lions also have an excellent chance to dodge victory the rest of the way. Detroit should be able to pull out a loss at home this week against the Redskins and has an excellent chance to remain winless the following week at Soldier Field. The following games against Jacksonville, Carolina, Tampa Bay and Tennessee don’t pose much of a threat. A Dec. 7 game against Minnesota could loom large if the Vikings struggle, especially since the Lions played them tough earlier this season. If they can escape with a defeat, they finish with Indianapolis, the Saints and the Packers.

Two winless teams? Hey, this season, anything is possible.

More evidence of that is my unusually strong record against the spread at this point of the campaign – three straight unbeaten weeks have me at 14-6-1 for the season against the line. This week, I hope to continue the run with … the Chargers-Saints over 46, the Seahawks plus 4 ½ at the 49ers and the Colts plus 4 at the Titans.

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