Santa has Mrs. Claus, the holly has the ivy, and Rudolph has eight – count ‘em, eight! – reindeer brethren to play reindeer games with come Christmas. If you’re not so lucky, don’t fret. You don’t need to swap saliva under mistletoe or sit around a fake fireplace sipping eggnog with relatives to be merry this holiday season. Whether you want to channel your inner redneck or keep it classy, here are four ways the Weekly suggests you spend your Christmas. And none of them involve calling birds.
1. Double your fun at the Double Down
If you know you’re getting coal for Christmas, don’t bother waiting up for Santa. Instead, spend your Christmas Eve with The Vermin at the Double Down Saloon’s White Trash Christmas. Nowhere else are John Deere trucker hats preferred over red fur-lined ones. Continue the merriment on Christmas night with the Double Down’s Swing Shift SideShow, where you can watch a “hooha dart shooter” and people eating glass. Fruitcake is so last year.
2. Choose-your-own Dickens adventure
The Stage Door Theatre at Town Square is putting a new spin on a Charles Dickens’ classic with the choose-your-own-adventure An Xmas Carol. Director Terrence Williams calls it “structured improv.” Guests who arrive early help decide the fate of Ebenezer Scrooge by choosing which spirits – a current celebrity, a historical figure and a fictional character – will visit. Just imagine Sarah Palin at the Cratchit house discussing health care options with Tiny Tim!
3. Get Haze-d
Haze will kick off 2010 with a strong month of DJs and hosts, starting with world famous Tiesto on New Year’s Eve, but you can check out a preview of the Strip’s newest mega-club during the soft opening this weekend. Christmas night will feature Sharam of Deep Dish and Faarsheed.
4. Watch TV. Lots of TV.
If it’s too damn cold for you to venture outside your home, find solace in a classic American pastime: television. Options are plentiful: ABC Family will play a string of holiday films; TBS will play 24 straight hours of A Christmas Story. Our suggestion? Ditch those feel-good feelings and watch the Criminal Minds marathon on A&E. Nothing kills that annoying holiday spirit like a murderer on a rampage.
None of these suit your fancy? Check out the Weekly ‘s Online Calendar for other events happening all around the city.