The Help Desk
Where we sort it all out for you
Thu, Jan 22, 2009 (midnight)
Overweight, unkempt Joaquin Phoenix performs incoherent rap at Vegas nightclub, falls off the stage. Or as Britney Spears would call it, Saturday night.
North Las Vegas foreclosure workshop draws nearly 1,500. Actually, most of them were just trying to get as far away as they could from Joaquin Phoenix.
UNLV economist predicts Nevada jobless rate will hit 10 percent this year. What’s that? Oh, sorry ... recently laid-off UNLV economist.
Report: Strip casino profits fell more than 57 percent in fiscal year 2007. And you know what that means: Time to cut all those tired, long-running production shows ...
Folies Bergere to close after 49 years. ... Hey, we were just kidding!
Gov. Jim Gibbons asks for 36 percent cut to higher education, suggests universities raise tuitions. So taxpayers are saved! Well, unless they have children, a job at a university or a vested interest in the country’s future ...
Las Vegas ranked fourth fattest city in America. That’s not fair—Joaquin Phoenix doesn’t even live here!