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Las Vegas Weekly Staff

Thu, Jul 23, 2009 (midnight)

Las Vegas personal injury lawyer sentenced to five years in prison on tax evasion charges. Odds are he’ll know much more about personal injury by then.

Unemployment rate in Las Vegas rises to 12.3 percent. No wonder Jim Gibbons is hiding out in Iraq.

MGM official describes Las Vegas economy as “bouncing along a bottom.” Making it the first time a sentence with the words “bouncing” and “bottom” has NOT turned us on.

NBA star Antoine Walker arrested for debts to three casinos. It wasn’t completely his fault: He learned about gambling by reading Charles Barkley’s Guide to Beating the House.

Troubled Fountainebleau canceling all events from January to June 2010. Either the project is in serious trouble or Lindsay Lohan is hosting a bachelorette party there.

Recent poll: Only three in 10 have favorable opinion of John Ensign. At least he hasn’t lost the “adultery, hush money, queasy ethics and stalking” vote.

Harry Reid says letter from Obama official states “no informal federal policy” against government meetings in Las Vegas. Especially after Obama learned Vegas has more great asses per capita than any non-G-8-hosting city.

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