Las Vegas Weekly

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Las Vegas Weekly Staff

Thu, Oct 29, 2009 (midnight)

• 21,900,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + dead

• Irony: What comes to Las Vegas to die (according to common saying)

• 64-70 percent: Cremation rate in Nevada, double the national average

• $300,000: Amount county spends annually on cremating indigent dead

• Dignified burial: What irony would prefer

• Vegas Die: Book we haven’t read

• Divas 2 Die 4: Local beauty salon

• The living dead: What infests Las Vegas in Resident Evil: Apocalypse

• Ditto: Legislature 2009: Apocalypse

• Dead Rabbits: Pool team that placed 17th in Las Vegas tournament in August

Photo: Mansholt PR

Liberace with the Rockettes.

• “The dead are everywhere in Las Vegas, and they are thriving”: Writer Charles Marowitz on celebrity impersonators

• 2: Museums commemorating dead entertainers (Elvis, Liberace)

• 2: Local taxidermists listed in yellowpages.com

• Taxidermy: Not enough of it in Elvis, Liberace museums

• 31,800,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + death

• Grim Reaper: Will officiate “gothic” ceremony at Viva Las Vegas Wedding Chapel

• “I don’t want to die, not here”: Esquire writer Scott Raab, on Laughlin (January 1998)

• “Where low-rollers hobble off to die”: Esquire, same issue, sticking it to Laughlin just a little bit more

• 4,860,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + murder

• 6: Murder-suicides in Las Vegas since September (year to date: 7)

• 22: Murders that late mobster Anthony Spilotro is suspected of

• 15,800,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + suicide

• Just visiting Las Vegas: Doubles risk of suicide, 2008 study concludes

• Imagine living here: Suicide is 54-62 percent more likely for residents here than elsewhere (same study)

• “I came here to drink myself to death”: Nic Cage in Leaving Las Vegas

• “I came here to think myself to death”: No one, ever, in history of Las Vegas

• “Phoenix-Las Vegas death match continues”: Real-estate headline (suggestion: Let Phoenix win)

Photo: Jeff Beacher

Jeff Beacher and friends.

• Killing us: What compiling this page is doing

• 24/7: Hours/days that Palm Mortuary’s Downtown crematorium operates

• Jeff Beacher’s near-death experience: Near enough? Discuss.

• 42,400: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + croak

• Go for Croak: 1969 episode of Tijuana Toads cartoon featuring minor Las Vegas reference

• “Vegas, nice place to visit, wouldn’t want to DIE there”: Tagline for 2004 movie Deathranch

• 10: Casinos imploded since the Dunes in 1993

• 170-plus: Signs in the Neon Boneyard

Photo: Jacob Kepler

• 96,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + cadaver

• “Cadaver jobs”: Came up in that last search. Okay, we’re listening ...

• 112: Deaths associated with construction of Hoover Dam

• $20: Cost of death certificate

• 13,790: Deaths reported in Clark County, 2007

• 1,412: Autopsies performed by county coroner’s office, 2007

• More proof TV lies to us: “It is not required or usually necessary for the next of kin to come to the Coroner’s facility to visually identify the decedent.” (Coroner’s website)

• “Casino floors in Vegas”: “Great place [to have a heart attack] since there are cameras everywhere and they have defibrillators around every corner.” (Dr. Sanjay Gupta)

• 459,000: Google search results for “Las Vegas” + demise

• Brain-cell death scream: Sound in our heads as we Googled the previous factoid. Help us ...

The Killers - before they were famous.

• At least 12: Deathy band names in LasVegasWeekly.com local band guide (Apathy of a Murder, Cutthroat Cadavers, Deth Kids, more)

• Oh, right: Also, The Killers (duh)

• No: Can a pet be buried with a human in a human cemetery?

• Yes: Can a human be buried with a pet in a pet cemetery?

• 40: Size, in acres, of Palm Memorial Park-Northwest

• $4,700: Cost of “Cherry Orthodox” casket at Palm Mortuary

• $25: Cost of cardboard box, for cremation at Palm Mortuary

• Cardboard, my ass: I want me a Cherry Orthodox, honey!