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The Help Desk

Where we sort it all out for you

Talking sex robot makes debut at Adult Entertainment Expo. It talks after sex? Won’t be a hit with guys, that’s for sure.

Travel group reports that Orlando has beaten Las Vegas as the most-booked destination. Las Vegas already hard at work on the solution: Topless Barry Manilow.

New book indicates Sen. Harry Reid said last year that Obama could be elected president because he is “light-skinned” and has “no Negro dialect, unless he wanted to have one.” “Wow, what a poor choice of words,” said Criss Angel.

Gov. Jim Gibbons claims he intends to sue the federal government over health-care reform. All while dismantling the education system and groping women in garages. Is there anything this man CAN’T do?

Stratosphere to begin offering customers 855-foot SkyJump. Finally, a ride that will simulate the feeling of being a homeowner for the last three years.

Steve Wynn agrees to surrender $741 million worth of stock to wife Elaine in divorce settlement. He offered $740M, but come on—the woman’s gotta EAT!

Ten Nevada vehicle inspectors indicted for allegedly falsifying results. If found guilty, they’ll all be given election jobs in Florida.

Rich Little becomes American citizen. He then took one look at America and said, “Uh, never mind. Can I go back to Canada now?”

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