Las Vegas Weekly

Ronnie from ‘Jersey Shore’ makes a terrible Chippendale

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro at Chippendales at The Rio on Feb. 12, 2011.

Chippendales

I love reality television. I love hot people in various states of undress. I thought these two loves would come together Saturday night when Jersey Shore’s Ronnie Ortiz-Magro hosted Chippendales, but sadly I was mistaken. The juicehead gorilla didn’t do much as the Rio revue’s first guest star: a few comments nobody could hear over the screaming grenades in the audience, a completely clothed cameo in a Dating Game-esqe sketch and 30 seconds of shirtless when he threw an autographed T-shirt into the audience (naturally, this occurred immediately following the requisite new clothing line plug). Not quite a “featured star,” as promised. Paying audiences didn’t even get to see him in the iconic Chippendales bow-tie-and-cufflinks uniform! Sure, the show is entertaining enough all on its own, and Ronnie stayed for a meet-and-greet afterward—but neither of those constitutes the “Ultimate Girls Night Out.”

If Crazy Horse can get gaggles of gorgeous female stars (Clair Sinclair, Carmen Elektra, Dita Von Teese) to rehearse and perform routines with them, is there not one man who can step forward and show some excited women a little man-ass?

Maybe The Situation is available?