5 things I wrote in my notebook at the Gwar concert
Wed, Apr 11, 2012 (5:50 p.m.)
1. The venue’s glass memorabilia case is wrapped in plastic, surely to protect it from collateral blood spatter. Wonder if frontman Oderus Urungus’ banana hammock will merit its own display …
2. Most bands’ roadies set up equipment and tune guitars pre-show; Gwar’s prep by placing fake organs and other body parts onstage.
3. Five minutes in and I can already tell every sentence I write in my notebook will inevitably end with the phrase, "then Gwar decapitated (blank) and spewed blood all over the audience.” Examples: zombie slaves, a “Jagermonsta” released from the castle dungeon and a crude representation of Snooki.
4. The more devoted the fan, the more blood-soaked the shirt.
5. Gwar still concludes its incredibly entertaining concert spectacle by inviting fans onstage to be gruesomely devoured by the “World Maggot,” a giant slug-monster puppet that extends from the stage and swallows its victims … then Gwar decapitated it and spewed blood all over the audience.