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Sal’s Celebrity Selectors — Week 8

I wonder what the folks in London think about the NFL game they'll have the opportunity to watch on Sunday.

On one hand, it's the first regular-season game ever played there, and will give Brits a chance to watch how Americans play professional football.

On the other hand, they're stuck with the winless Dolphins. Maybe they won't notice that big 0-7 in parenthesis behind the team name.

I'm sure some die-hard fans will go just to make fun of our football, where the players wear pads and everyone can use their hands, and we toss flags around rather than raising cards.

But it's a shame that the league couldn't schedule a better game there. Not that anyone knew Miami would be 0-7 -- and I suppose it was fortunate that the Rams weren't the team on their schedule this week -- but I wonder how Roger Goodell and folks around the league office were feeling when the Giants were 0-2 and trailing by 17 points to the Redskins in their third game before rallying to turn their season around. Imagine how "excited" people would be if the Giants were, say, 1-5 heading into this game or something.

As it is, at least the London media has something positive to focus on. Now all they have to do is get the people there to understand why a team in New York really plays in New Jersey. Or why all of our players have first and last names.

I think the teams should go out of their way to make the crowd feel at home. A few suggestions:

-- Just put three hours on the game clock and let it run continuously. It would be great to see Miami kick a game-winning field goal at the last second of regulation only to find out four minutes of injury time has been added.

-- When a team lines up for a field goal, allow a defender to stand atop the cross bar and see if he can knock the kick away. Kind of a second-floor goalie thing.

-- On all personal-foul penalties, force the penalized team to play a man short the rest of the game. Maybe if the Dolphins can get in an 11-on-8 situation, they've got a chance.

****

The celebrity picks:

Lance Burton, Monte Carlo headliner

(10-9-2)

Packers +3 at Broncos

Colts -7 at Panthers

Patriots -16 1/2 vs. Redskins

****

Anthony Crivello, star of "Phantom - The Las Vegas Spectacular"

(11-8-2)

Bears -5 vs. Lions

Colts -7 at Panthers

Vikings +1 vs. Eagles

****

Danny Gans, Mirage headliner

(11-8-2)

Colts -7 at Panthers

Bills +2 1/2 at Jets

Redskins +16 1/2 at Patriots

****

Oscar Goodman, mayor of Las Vegas

(13-7-1)

Colts -7 at Panthers

Giants -10 vs. Dolphins

Patriots -16 1/2 vs. Washington

****

Hans Klok, Planet Hollywood headliner

(11-9-1)

Patriots -16 1/2 vs. Redskins

Steelers -3 1/2 at Bengals

Colts -7 at Panthers

****

Wayne Newton, "Mr. Las Vegas"

(5-12-4)

Dolphins +10 vs. Giants

Lions +5 at Bears

Saints -3 at 49ers

***

Penn & Teller, Rio headliners

(15-6)

Patriots -16 1/2 vs. Redskins

Giants -10 vs. Dolphins

Eagles -1 at Vikings

****

Rita Rudner, Harrah's headliner

(13-7-1)

Colts -7 at Panthers

Titans -7 1/2 vs. Raiders

Buccaneers -4 vs. Jaguars

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