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Nightlife

Nightlife Value Menu

Your guide to enjoying the luxurious life in frugal times

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Dan Sipple

Economic Stimulus Package our foot.

Or … feet. Like much of America, Team Hangover is feeling the crunch—and it’s not of crisp bills in our palms. We’re ballin’ on a budget this summer, Las Vegas. So clip those coupons and break out the plastic yard drinks—it’s time to become Nightlife Value Menunaires!

Two-For-One Deals

Hard Rock Hotel’s Center Bar hosts a happy hour Monday through Friday from 4-8 p.m. featuring two-for-one call drinks and $2 domestic beers. Center of Attention Thursdays also pays out $300 to the “hottest girl in the bar.”

Treasures Gentlemen’s Club provides one of the most all-inclusive seven-day-a-week happy-hour specials with a complimentary buffet, free well drinks and domestic beer from 4-6 p.m., and two-for-one “you-call-it” and premium drinks from 4-8 p.m.

How’s this for manners? Vox Wine Lounge’s happy hour features a “first one is always on us” round, followed by rotating nightly specials ranging from $7 martinis and $7 Maker’s Mark to $7 wine, $7 champagne and two-for-one drink specials, and always with complimentary nibbles. Monday night’s Gluttony industry pre-party dinner additionally offers half-off all food menu items after 9 p.m. They may call it gluttony—we just call it thrifty.

Super Size Me

Al’s Garage in the District can get you liquored up but good with the 60-ounce Grease Monkey, a bladder-busting blend of vodka, amaretto, blue Curacao, sugar-free Monster energy drink, cranberry juice and 151 served in a Monster bucket for $30. You might want to tell the taxi to wait …

Rockhouse at the Imperial Palace is taking drinking to all new heights and sizes with a trio of logo garage-sale miscellany from which to drink. Try doing mini-keg-stands off the 192-ounce (that’s 16 12-ounce beers) mini-kegs of Becks and Heineken for just $75 before 10:30 p.m., $150 after. Then take the next step and try on Rockhouse’s 72-ounce plastic logo beer bottle for size. The portable adult-sized sippy cup costs just $20 when filled with beer, $25 for any of the many flavors of daiquiri. Or dive into the 80-ounce life-sized plastic guitar “yard glass” for $40, with—if you can stand it—refills for just $20.

Try Our Buffet

Polly Esther’s at the Stratosphere offers a $40 all-you-can-drink special all night long, Wednesday through Saturday nights. That’s $10 per decade party room!

Stoney’s Rockin’ Country nightclub cures those old greenback-lackin’ blues with $20 all-you-can-drink draft beer Friday and Saturday nights.

Polly Esther’s at the Stratosphere offers a $40 all-you-can-drink special all night long, Wednesday through Saturday nights. That’s $10 per decade party room!

Stoney’s Rockin’ Country nightclub cures those old greenback-lackin’ blues with $20 all-you-can-drink draft beer Friday and Saturday nights.

Buy the Bottle

With prices often upward of $300 (or $400, or $500), you might expect a bottle of Grey Goose to come with a side of golden eggs. The cause for the excessive markup is that you’re not just paying for the vodka, but also for a place to sit and drink it. At Downtown Cocktail Room, the seats are free, and thus the savings are passed on to you. You get the whole bottle for $170, the same price you’d pay to have it poured out a little at a time.

Wine

At the Rock ’n Roll Wine Happy Hour on Saturday, May 24, at Sedona, RnR will be pouring both their Reggae Rhapsody and The Grotto wines for just $5 per glass from 7-9 p.m. Ladies even drink for free from 7-8 p.m.

The Manager’s Special

Wait till Oscar Goodman gets wind of this! Every second Saturday Downtown’s Sidebar throws a “Patio Party” featuring our Mayor’s favorite libation, Bombay Sapphire Gin. Each month throws the spotlight on a different Bombay Sapphire cocktail, available for only $5 the entire night.

The Bacon-Lover’s Special

You aren’t a true bacon-lover until you’ve experienced the Double Down Saloon’s bacon martini—and you can, 24/7, 365. Bust out a $5 bill at the “Happiest Place on Earth” for your own bacon-infused vodka concoction. If you can’t stomach it, just remember the Double Down’s ever-important rule: You puke, you clean.

Combo No. 1

Everyone is ordering at once to get in on the daily half-priced martinis, wine and appetizers at Blue Martini. Beginning at 4 p.m., patrons can be seen with a martini in one hand, an ice-cold shaker in the other—if you can get the servers’ or bartenders’ attention over the crowd clamoring to get their money’s worth before the clock strikes 8 and prices go back to normal. Downstairs at a similarly packed Yard House, a similarly priced happy hour runs 3-6 p.m. Monday through Friday and 11 p.m.-2 a.m. Sunday through Wednesday with half-off appetizers and beers, and discounts on wine.

Combo No. 3

Green Valley residents can give the stove a rest by taking Kennedy’s up on its three-course dinner with three glasses of wine on Wednesdays at The District.

Combo No. 75

Suburbanites waaaaaay on the outskirts of town can still get gussied up and head to Sedona Restaurant and Lounge for Image Wednesdays and the equally attractive $75 bottle specials. As an added bonus, ladies are treated to open bar from 9-10 p.m.

Combo No. 777

Show your tattoo at the Ice House Lounge to get in free before 11 p.m. for Inked Fridays. Hang out with other tatted patrons for this nightlife alternative featuring live music and X-107.5-FM’s Homie and his trusty DJ Bean—the self-proclaimed “Undynamic Duo” and hosts of Sunday night’s It Hurts When I Pee radio show.

Healthy Options

Watermelons, cantaloupes, kumquats, strawberries, grapes … the list goes on and on with Sidebar’s Martini of the Day. A new fresh fruit is selected each evening to take center stage in their $5 featured martini—perfect for clientele watching their high-fructose corn syrup intake.

Happy Meals

It’s a two-fer. Or rather, a three-fer! The cosmetic surgery offices of Stephen W. Gordon M.D. advertise that with the purchase of a pair of silicone breast implants for $5,400, clients can add on an area of liposuction for just an additional $1,200. And for the busy socialite, Dr. Gordon’s office caters to locals with extended and weekend hours.

Ladies, take note. Body English’s Indulge Fridays unloads at least $5,000 in free high-fashion merchandise giveaways; plus, the fairer sex enjoys free champagne until midnight.

Compliments of the chef, locals get priority reservations and priority seating as well as a free dessert at Wolfgang Puck’s six Vegas restaurants (Chinois, Cut, Spago, Postrio, Wolfgang Puck Bar & Grill and Trattoria del Lupo). And just for being a local!

Happy Meal, Schmappy Meal. Most bars figure you’re happy enough on the weekends already that you don’t need a happy hour on Saturday or Sunday, but not so for Red Room Saloon, which offers a lengthy happy hour seven days a week from 3-7 p.m. Red Room even sweetens the deal with free billiards, because, as every kid knows, the real best part of a Happy Meal is that it comes with something to play with.

Mexican

Tuesday taco night at Mi Casa inside the Silverton Casino features half-off Miller Chills and free chips and salsa from 4-7 p.m., and then continues with $1.50 tacos from 7-9 p.m.

Sushi

Ra Sushi serves up $3 well drinks, $1 hot sake shots, $6 apple martinis and cosmos, appetizer specials and five sushi dishes starting at just $3 per item every Monday through Friday from 4-7 p.m.

Tapas

Tapas-lovers can enjoy half-off of everything at Dragonfly every night after 10:30 p.m.

At the spanking-new R.E. Tapas at Silverado Ranch and Bermuda, Tuesday’s RElapse industry party and ladies’ night provides women with complimentary mojitos from 8 p.m.-midnight, while everyone gets to enjoy 25 percent off tapas all night long, making the drive all the more worthwhile.

Dessert

If your night on the town takes you to Tryst, be sure to leave room for dessert, as bottle service comes with an assortment of chocolate and vanilla candies, served on a silver platter. Champagne brings with it a side of strawberries, a sweet reason to pop open that bottle and celebrate.

Side Dishes

It isn’t a real movie night without popcorn. That’s why Red Room Saloon’s Monday Movie Nights offer a side of free popcorn with your main course of cult cinema. Not a bad deal when you consider that a real movie theater would charge you as much for the popcorn as they do for the ticket.

Cost-minded sports fans will enjoy the $1.79 per person per game special at Lucky Strike Bowling Lanes on Wednesdays from 9-11 p.m., sucking down $2 domestic drafts all the while. Sunday brings with it Latin night featuring $1 cervezas and free bowling for las chicas from 9-11 p.m.

Several of the SkyBox Cabanas in the main room of Tao Nightclub prepare you for a good night by giving you a personal refrigerator full of beer, water, Red Bull, a camera, condoms, edible panties and lube. The rest is up to you!

Cabana-dwellers at Wet Republic will delight to find that six each of Red Bull, Corona and bottled water come thoughtfully pre-stocked in the cabana refrigerator. All the better to start off your Sunday by the pool or to stuff your beach bag right before you take off.

Or forget the costly on-Strip pool parties altogether. A cabana rental at the Westin Casuarina will only set you back $75 for all-day access (8 a.m.-7 p.m.) to a cabana, the pool, two chaises, misters, a fruit bowl and a mini-fridge stocked with six bottled waters.

Something Extra

To get that perfect red-carpet smile, Vegas nightlife pros rely on the expertise of Dr. Matt Welebir. On select days throughout the year, clients can take advantage of Dr. Matt’s Invisalign Day. Eligible patients can receive a free consultation, free teeth whitening and $1,250 off their Invisalign treatment.

Look good and get tipsy all at the same time at the Beauty Bar with “polish demonstrations” and hand massages on Friday nights (except First Friday). Though the service is free, don’t forget to tip the nail technician while getting toasted and talking to a drag queen named Bulimia—careful, your polish is still wet!

Hibiscus Spa at the Westin Casuarina offers a spa “happy hour” Monday through Thursday, from 1-6 p.m., with buy-one-get-one-half-off spa services including body scrubs, massages and facials.

The greatest/best/easiest website from which to sign up for free entry to some top nightclubs (and even a pool) is N9NEGroup.com, where you can gain almost effortless entry into Moon, Playboy, Rain, Ghostbar and the Palms Pool & Bungalows—provided you meet some basic criteria. Just scroll down from each club name to “Tables/Guestlist” to access the form. Take that, smug VIP host guy!

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