The Help Desk
Where we sort it all out for you
Thu, Jun 26, 2008 (midnight)
Terry Lanni resigns from Gaming Association to devote more time to what’s important: Returning to the top spot on the “wealthiest Las Vegas executives” list.
Some Nevada brothels report 45 percent decline in revenues. Sex lives of married couples improving statewide.
Mayor Goodman to recognize Friday as National HIV Testing Day. Though thanks to Dipak Desai, most Las Vegans have already gotten tested.
Kirk Kerkorian buys 20.8 million more shares of stock in Ford. Yeah, well, we just put the winning bid in on a VHS copy of Pretty in Pink. Jealous?
Charles Barkley enters celebrity poker event in Las Vegas for charity. Charities reportedly remark, “Nah, we’re good …”
Report: Nevadans lead the nation in delinquent credit-card payments. We’re really stressed over this news. We need to go shopping!
Nevada unemployment at 6.2 percent, highest rate since 1994. Thankfully people have their credit cards to sustain them until they find another job.