Noise
Post-apocalyptic fun with Dead Neon
Forming a metal band: an interesting way to sell poetry
Thu, Sep 17, 2009 (midnight)
Jarret Keene is about as cute as metal is ever going to get.
Photo: Bill Hughes
Dead Neon wasn’t created to be comedic, but the self-described “primitive nuclear rapture doom metal” band sure makes the audience laugh at its Tuesday night Freakin’ Frog debut.
Frontman and creator Jarret Keene is about as un-metal it gets. An author who contributes regularly to CityLife, he’s got a dad-next-door look and a pink Hello Kitty guitar. The guitar is adorable, and Keene’s voice is as cute as metal is ever going to get. He’s got the gruff, guttural thing down, as well as the aggressive riffs to back it up. Still, he appears neither ferocious nor particularly comfortable onstage, coming off more like someone doing obscure metal karaoke, only pretending to be a rocker.
Audio Clips
Dead Neon
- Adobe Flash Player Required to listenBlack Ash
- Adobe Flash Player Required to listenCratered
- Adobe Flash Player Required to listenDownwinder
- Adobe Flash Player Required to listenIrradiated Heart
Actually, that isn’t so far from the truth. Twenty years removed from the last band he played in, Keene threw together Dead Neon only to promote his latest book of poetry, A Boy’s Guide to Arson. Including rehearsals, tonight is the group’s fourth time together. The live debut—a few songs played after poetry readings and before a real band goes on—is less about Dead Neon’s metal-jam aura than about having fun and peddling poetry.
So, when a fog machine goes off during the final post-apocalyptic song, and Keene cracks up with laughter, forgets the words and improvises lyrics about the fog machine being a bitch, the audience laughs along. Everyone’s in on the joke, and that makes it all okay.
Make no mistake, anyone playing music is a "real" band, particularly if they make you laugh. Do not underestimate Dead Neon's dedication to the Nordic Death Metal Ethos. Although Hello Kitty is not recognized in the pantheon of Nordic deities, The Neibelungs, Volsungs, Fjorgyn, Midggard, Modgud, & the sacred cow goddess Audumbla will surely vaporize with thunderbolts & otherwise kick the asses of anyone who does not take any Death Metal band seriously. Hello Kitty scoffers will not pass through the hallowed gates of golden Valhalla, your loss. Jarret Keene is the incarnation of Loki, Norse God of Chaos, this must be understood. Laughter is sacred to Brynhilde and Gullveig, not to mention the great goddess Frigga. As Wodin decreed at the Yggdrasil tree, if you must live, you must laugh, and, of course, you must preserve the absolute purity of Death Metal music through promulgation of the Nordic religion, with the assistance of Hello Kitty if necessary. . Dead Neon's approach is nothing short of genius. Hail Odin.
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